The Eastern World: no longer in Kansas, apparently.

Before I start posting my final accounts of the incredible India, I feel I must address the many of you who have recently written to kindly remind me that you’re sitting at home each night, staring at the same ceiling fan, clicking through your browser awaiting my tales of adventure and humorous misfortune.

My dear friends, I have not forgotten you. I have simply entered a corner of the globe where the so-called worldwide Web is not exactly world wide, and my internet restrictions are akin to those of a strict Catholic school. I suppose the main difference is that I’m actually in communist China, where Facebook is a bit more than a slap on the wrist and Google is banned for noncompliance with Chinese advertising regulation. And apparently, I know of nothing else on the intraweb.

As soon as I arrived and logged onto wifi in a corner coffee shop, I realized that nearly every form of communication app I use is under the umbrella of either Google or Facebook. Which at first was slightly maddening, but I simply accepted my reality outside of the norm we’ve deemed “Kansas” and I proceeded to sulk for only 7 minutes.

It wasn’t until I turned on my phone’s gps in a casual attempt to find my way to the metro that the severity of my Googless situation became apparent. Okay, so no GoogleMaps. No need to panic Cass… you’ll just get the address from your email and take a cheap cab.
Now why the cuss won’t Gmail open?! Oh that’s right, because it’s Gmail!!! I’m pretty sure by this point I had beads of sweat running down the tip of my nose, spattering dramatically onto the screen of my now worthless smart phone. Tremors set in rather quickly, and I was seconds away from throwing my arms above my head in a wailing curse to the demons of Google for making me so pathetically reliant on their fancy-pants maps and adorable emoticons… when I remembered that I had taken a photo of the address before leaving India. At which point I regained my sanity and the color in my cheeks before skipping happily along the street to snag a cab. And that was the first of my 71 hours in Shanghai: an embarrassing reaction to lack of apps and a firm lesson in technology dependence.

But actually, the sole point of this post was simply to let you know that more is coming. I have roughly 3 half written posts about India and the colorful world I’ve inhabited over the past month, but you may have to wait until I make it to Malaysia where I can post freely. Until then, a word to the wise: don’t sell your soul to the Internet, life is a bit more exciting without all the answers in your palm.

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